Communications Breakthrough
                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Because you can't see the person who is sending you electronic mail you
are sometimes uncertain whether they are serious or joking.  Recently,
Scott Fahlman at CMU devised a scheme for annotating one's messages to
overcome this problem.  If you turn your head sideways to look at the
three characters :-) they look sort of like a smiling face.  Thus, if
someone sends you a message that says "Have you stopped beating your
wife? :-) " you know they are joking.  If they say "I need to talk to
you :-( ", be prepared for trouble.
 
Since Scott's original proposal, many further symbols have been proposed:
 
 :-)     humor.
 :->     humor variation.
 %-}     humor variation.
 :-))    fat guy smiling.
 :-{)    person with moustache smiling
 :-(     sad.
 :-<     sad variation.
 %-{     sad variation.
 :_)     tongue in cheek
 :-!     foot in mouth
 <:-)    for dumb questions.
 
 (:-)    for messages dealing with bicycle helmets.
 (8-)    for messages dealing with owls.
 d:-)    for messages dealing with baseball.
 d :-o   hats off to your great idea
 q:-)    for those who wear their caps backwards.
 @=      for messages dealing with nuclear war.
 o>-<|=  for messages of interest only to women.
 ~=      a candle, to annotate flaming messages.
 oo      for somebody's head-lights are on messages.
 ;-)     say no more, nudge nudge.
 :-$     put your money where your mouth is
 >:->    leer
 ;-}     leer? (terminal dependent)
 |-<>    kissy face
 :-|     man playing an harmonica
 O:-)    for those innocent souls
 [:|]    from a robot (or other appropriate AI project)
 :>)     from someone with a big nose
 :<|     from someone who attends an Ivy League school
 :%)%    from someone with acne
 =:-)    from a hosehead
 :-(*)   from someone who is about to vomit
 :-)8    from someone who is well dressed
 8:-)    from a little girl
 :-)-{8  from a big girl
 #-)     from someone who partied all night
 %-\     from someone hungover
 :-*     from someone who just ate a sour pickle
 -:-)    from someone who sports a mohawk and admires Mr. T
 :-'|    from someone who has a cold
 :-)'    from someone who tends to drool
 ':-)    from someone who accidentally shaved off one of his eyebrows
 
 8:]     from a gorilla
 
 (:)-)   from someone wearing scuba mask
 
 P-)     from someone getting fresh
 |-)     from someone who is falling asleep
 .-)     from someone with one eye
 :=)     from someone with two noses
 :-D     from someone who talks too much
 
Miscellaneous:
 
 (-:|:-) Siamese twins
 :~/     Really mixed up
         the invisible man
 {:\/    sounds like a duck
 .\/     duck variation
 :-0
 |:-O
 %+{     from the loser of a fight
 
 (-:   User is left handed
%-)   User has been staring at a green screen for 15 hours straight
:-{}  User wears lipstick
{:-)  User wears a toupee
}:-(  Toupee in an updraft
:-[   User is a Vampire
:-7   User juust made a wry statement
:'-(  User is crying
:'-)  User is so happy, s/he is crying
:-@   User is screaming
:-#   User wears braces
:^)   User has a broken nose
:v)   User has a broken nose, but it's the other way
:_)   User's nose is sliding off of his face
:<)   User is from an Ivy League School
:-&   User is tongue tied.
+-:-) User is the Pope or holds some other religious office
`:-)  User shaved one of his eyebrows off this morning
,:-)  Same thing...other side
|-I   User is asleep
|-O   User is yawning/snoring
:-Q   User is a smoker
:-?   User smokes a pipe
O-)   Megaton Man On Patrol!  (or else, user is a scuba diver)
O :-) User is an angel (at heart, at least)
:-P   Nyahhhh!
:-S   User just made an incoherent statement
:-D   User is laughing (at you!)
:-X   User's lips are sealed
:-C   User is really bummed
<|-)  User is Chinese
<|-(  User is Chinese and doesn't like these kind of jokes
:-/   User is skeptical
C=:-) User is a chef
@=    User is pro-nuclear war
*<:-) User is wearing a Santa Claus Hat
:-o   Uh oh!
(8-o  It's Mr. Bill!
*:o)  And Bozo the Clown!
3:]   Pet smilie
3:[   Mean Pet smilie
d8=   Your pet beaver is wearing goggles and a hard hat.
E-:-) User is a Ham radio operator
:-9   User is licking his/her lips
%-6   User is braindead
[:-)  User is wearing a walkman
(:I   User is an egghead
<:-I  User is a dunce
K:P   User is a little kid with a propeller beenie
@:-)  User is wearing a turban
:-0   No Yelling!  (Quiet Lab)
:-:   Mutant Smilie
.-)   User only has one eye
,-)   Ditto...but he's winking
X-(   User just died
8 :-) User is a wizard
C=}>;*{))  Mega-Smilie... A drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an updraft,
                          a mustache, and a double chin
 
Note: A lot of these can be typed without noses to make midget smilies.
 
:)  Midget smilie
:]  Gleep...a friendly midget smilie who will gladly be your friend
=)  Variation on a theme...
   ___
  /   \
 | RIP |
 |_____|    from someone who is dead
 -------
 
So you see, bit-mapped displays are really quite unnecessary :->

Have fun with these!