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 "dto gets shot down to earth"
 - pieced together & edited by mercuri
 - missing logs supplied by gaurdian
 - nifty topic provided by The Masked Marauder (tMM)

        this should be pretty much self explanatory, everyone in #zines at
 the time wanted a log, so here it is.

        i quickly ran this through spell check you retentive sonsabitches,
 and i tried to make it as readable & followable as humanly possible.

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 <m3rkuri> how's dto coming mogel????????????????
 <mogel> i suppose it's ok!!
 <mogel> we'll be around FOREVER!!!
 <m3rkuri> you better be!! otherwise that tattoo is worthless!! you'd have to
           change your name to remain respectable!

 <mogel> i'm actually registering dto as a real business tomorrow
 <mogel> & i'm getting the official po box tomorrow
 <mogel> 'cause we're gonna start SELLING STUFF soon!
 <m3rkuri> hey mog... why?
 <m3rkuri> reality check: dto is an e-zine
 <mogel> @uhm
 <mogel> t-shirts!  comic books!  music!
 <m3rkuri> oh please
 <_8> i had no idea dto was expected to be a huge corporation
 <mogel> mercuri, dto is a productions company.
 <m3rkuri> and i'm napoleon.
 <_8> maybe not _expected_ but hoped to be

 <mogel> when i'm @makin' money, mercuri, you'll still be @bitchin'
 <m3rkuri> uh. nope.
 <mogel> yep!
 <m3rkuri> when you're making money, dto will be a dead e-zine
 <m3rkuri> i guarantee that.
 <mogel> errrr
 <m3rkuri> sorry if i sound mean!!!
 <mogel> it's ok.
 <mogel> when you're wrong it'll be cool
 <mogel> 'cause dto is never going to be dead
 <m3rkuri> it may hibernate until all its members die
 <mogel> huh?
 <m3rkuri> you might never declare it's dead, but it may be inactive
 <_8> "what happens when you reach 999?"
 <_8> @heh.
 <mogel> uhm, no mercuri
 <mogel> you're missing the idea here.
 <mogel> see, it will always be monthly.
 <m3rkuri> i guarantee, i _guarantee_ dto will never be a business that reaps
           profits.
 <mogel> why's that, mercuri?
 <mogel> what makes you so sure?!!?!
 <m3rkuri> because that's what i think.
 <mogel> any logic at all, or what?
 <m3rkuri> i know for sure, that 5 people,... or however many are mainly
           involved will not live off of it
 <mogel> obviously not, mercuri
 <mogel> it doesn't take a brain surgeon to realize that
 <m3rkuri> well, that's what your saying mogel, or at least that's what i'm
 hearing

 <@kkrazy> 'cause @yer to 31337
 <@ven> i @wanna work for mogel if he gets rich
 <mogel> but it can still be a source of money
 <mogel> uh
 <mogel> no, i never said it would be anyone's ONLY source of income
 <m3rkuri> you said you'd be _rich_
 <mogel> sure, & i'm exaggerating
 <_8> rich like a fudge ripple.
 <m3rkuri> how else could you become rich from dto (money wise) if the money
           didn't come from dto?
 <mogel> rich isn't really a heavily defined word
 <mogel> i mean, what's rich to one person isn't rich to another
 <_8> @hahahah
 <kkrazy> mogel: don't be silly. your being a pisshead
 <m3rkuri> what's rich to you?
 <m3rkuri> 500 bucks a year?
 <mogel> rich to me is having more than enough money to get by.
 <mogel> mercuri, my rent if 500 a month
 <m3rkuri> so is my brother's!
 <m3rkuri> how much do you expect to make on t-shirts?
 <mogel> i have no idea, mercuri
 <mogel> but it's obvious you're trying to be anal on me
 <kkrazy> i think he's just trying to be realistic.
 <mogel> there's no doubt in my mind that i will make some money
         from this
 <m3rkuri> mogel - okay, lesse.. how many copies of dto-12 are out there,
           that people have read?
 <mogel> who knows, mercuri.   there's 250 people on the mailing
 list.  but files spread.
 <mogel> & there's the www.
 <mogel> etc
 <m3rkuri> let's say 400 people read dto COMPLETELY...
 <m3rkuri> how much are the t-shirts gonna be?
 <kkrazy> $15
 <m3rkuri> ok.
 <m3rkuri> how much do the t-shirts cost to make?
 <mogel> i think about 5 or so dollars. maybe 6.
 <m3rkuri> ok, so you're making 9 bux profit per shirt.
 <m3rkuri> for every 10 people that read the 'zine.. lets say 2 people by the
 shirt
 <_8> i'd buy a dto tshirt.
 <_8> but i spend $50-90 a week on pot, so.
 <kkrazy> that's only 3600 bux. that's if everybody buys one.
 <mogel> that's really not bad.
 <mogel> in case you didn't know!

 <m3rkuri> holdon, lemme do the math.
 <_8> besides, that could just be groundwork for a larger selection of things
      to sell,etc. and then more stuff to sell, more chance someone will buy
      something.
 <m3rkuri> okay... so if 2 out of 10 people buy this shirt, it's $720 bucks,
           now what do you do with the money?  keep in mind, everyone who
           wants to buy a t-shirt has bought one, and now the sales taper-off

 <kkrazy> there should be dto toilet covers
 <ven> coffee mugs, pencils, notepads
 <kkrazy> coffee mugs are expensive ven, i've looked into it for my coffeeshop
 <Pezzy> i should get into old slip
 <ven> dto cologne
 <_8> haha. "doomed to obscurity" isn't really a marketable name for products
 though
 <kkrazy> heheh
 <mogel> what are you talking about?
 <mogel> of course it is
 <_8> "scent of mogel"
 <mogel> it's alternative, man
 <kkrazy> "stench of mogel"
 <ven> hahaha

 <mogel> anyhow, mercuri .. it's just a small peice of global domination!
 <mogel> because as time goes on, we'll get more fans & more stuff!
 <m3rkuri> stop that, mogel
 <m3rkuri> everyone knows i'm the only one with enough military knowledge to
           conquer a seven-11
 <kkrazy> hehe
 <mogel> oh my
 <mogel> maybe you're right.
 <mogel> i'll stay away from the mini-markets.
 <ven> eau de toilette
 <kkrazy> and be bigger than cDc. in your dreams
 <_8> "disgust yourself with JAMESY i perfume"
 
 <ven> the "mogel in the morning" radio show
 <kkrazy> hahahaha
 <_8> doorstops.
 <_8> dtocola
 <kkrazy> dto tampons
 <kkrazy> and pads!
 <m3rkuri> dto place settings.
 <_8> you could call it DC for short and in washington it'd go like wildfire
 <kkrazy> dto condoms, they glow in the dark
 <mogel> seriously, though... eerie has a radical c0mic he's selling.. there's
         music demos & silly cat & more...

 <mogel> at the very least, it'll get us some money
 <mogel> & some is better than none!
 <m3rkuri> mogel - is a record company coming, too?
 <mogel> mercuri, if that is what phil wants, but that seems kinda unlikely.
 <mogel> i don't know anything about it, though
 <m3rkuri> it would seem like a waste of that $720 bucks, mogel.  i'd go buy
           some new shoes or something.
 <mogel> what would be a waste of it?
 <m3rkuri> a recording company
 <_8> new shoes don't pick up the bass as well as recording equipment,
      mercuri. :) :) :) :) heheheHEHEhehe
 <mogel> well, i have no part in that merc
 <mogel> my money is going to go towards something more productive.  who
         knows what!

 <ven> dto fake tattoos
 <m3rkuri> cdc has fake tattoos
 <kkrazy> dto beer
 <ven> dto recordings
 <kkrazy> vials of pure dto adrenaline@!#
 <_8> dare i say.. DIET dtocola?
 <_8> heh
 <kkrazy> dtoII
 <kkrazy> but it'll flop
 <_8> mogel; export weapons.
 <ven> dto - the movie
 <kkrazy> hehehe
 <tMM> clear dto soda
 <mogel> it's DTO!

 <ven> the law offices of dt&o
 <kkrazy> dt&o hah
 <kkrazy> dto carpeting.
 <_8> "Best of dto"
 <kkrazy> mogel fashion line
 <_8> "the dto family tree" as a poster
 <Mephisto> mogel and kathy-lee
 <ven> yeah! plus sizes by mogel

 <tMM> wait, say you make 720 bucks, you do have to divide it up amongst the
 inner circle right?
 <mogel> no, tMm
 <mogel> it's my money.  i am making the shirts, etc
 <tMM> ahh.

 <mogel> i wish you guys were funny, 'cause i'd be laughing a lot
 <m3rkuri> only cuz we're blaspheming dto.
 <mogel> not really, mercuri
 <_8> "the gospel according to dto"
 <kkrazy> that's already in the works, 8.
 <_8> wow, that'd be a neat t-file title.
 <ven> the dto bible at barnes and nobles
 <kkrazy> mogel, don't be anal
 <mogel> i mean, it's really not funny

 <mogel> "rad underwear!  ha ha!"
 <mogel> i mean, it gets pretty dumb.
 <m3rkuri> mogel, rad isn't claiming underwear, we're only claiming the end
 of communism, quite slowly, i might add.
 <m3rkuri> just the other day a marine promised me & handle a war
 with china within 10 years

 <_8> i'm not blaspheming.
 <_8> i'm just brainstorming.
 <_8> "dto unplugged"

 <kkrazy> dto cheese of the month club.
 <_8> now, mike; are you trademarking dto AND doomed to obscurity?
 <_8> meaning, both forms of saying it?
 <mogel> they are already trademarked, 8
 <mogel> yes
 <_8> huh?
 <_8> legally?
 <mogel> yeah
 <_8> whoa.
 <kkrazy> that rocks
 <m3rkuri> how much does that cost, mogel?
 <mogel> it cost something like 25 bucks.
 <mogel> although most things that get put out 'zine-wise on the net get
 instant copyrights, i still did it


 <_8> "dto scout cookies"
 <_8> for that matter, "dto scouts"
 <mogel> i forget the exact price.
 <kkrazy> lord baden mogel
 <ven> dto cruise lines
 <mogel> "dto markers!!!  hahahahahaha!!!!  HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
 <kkrazy> heh
 <m3rkuri> woah, mogel's pissed
 <mogel> i'm not pissed at all.
 <mogel> i'm amazed that dto could fixate you guys at this wee hour in the
 morning for oh-so long.
 <mogel> but that's GOOD!
 <tMM> it isn't dto, its your idealism. :)
 <tMM> dto island
 <_8> "welcome to the dto carwash. i'm mogel, may i scrub your wipers?"
 <m3rkuri> dto land! with mogel mouse!!!
 <kkrazy> dto land, made completely of nerf
 <_8> mogel mouse! hahaha
 <kkrazy> all the suicidal members of dto could jump off the third floor and
 they would just bounce back off of the nerf
 <kkrazy> it would rule.

 <mogel> there's druggies outside my window
 <_8> there's a druggie in my room!
 <_8> ahhhh!
 <_8> i told them not to put mirrors in here.
 <_8> "listen to the drummer of (stupidbandname). he's playing a dto
 special hoooked up to a Doomed X Amp"
 <_8> wait. i meant guitarist.
 <tMM> your naivete (sp?)
 <mogel> heh
 <mogel> when you learn to spell it, you can talk to me about it
 <tMM> that i'll do, mogel.
 <tMM> mogel; when you actually get this off the ground, you can
 talk to me about the riches which you will bathe in.
 <mogel> sure thing, dude!
 <m3rkuri> mogel pez dispensers!!  with real angst flavoured pez!!!

 <_8> "dto eggplant stew"
 <mogel> it's ashame i'm not straight-edge.
 <m3rkuri> "dto flavored ramen"
 <_8> flavored? uh.
 <m3rkuri> 8 - yes.  shh. *wink*
 <m3rkuri> "dto hair-dye"
 <Mephisto> duck a'la dto
 <_8> "how to create a zine, by dto productions"
 <ven> the dto luxury sedan..  starting at 24,900
 <m3rkuri> haha

 <m3rkuri> the writers of dto will definitely want a peice of all this money,
           you wont expect them to write for free, will you                      
           mogel???????????????????                                              
 <mogel> mercuri, if there was an actual print 'zine production, we could get    
         away with that.                                                         
 <mogel> maybe at some future point.                                             
 <_8> ooh.                                                                       
 <m3rkuri> i dunno.  not if it's underground! it'd have to be like People
           magazine! (which is pretty popular)
 <mogel> true                                                                    
 <tMM> i wouldn't write for free if i see you making a lot of money.             
 <kkrazy> merc, they would write for free, just because they love to write.      
         they would do it not for the money, but for the love$@ like the        
         computer industry :)                                                   
 <m3rkuri> kkrazy - and once again, i'm napoleon                                 
 <kkrazy> he was short.  be nero.
 <m3rkuri> i mean, people would write for big*geek cuz it's non-for-profit
 <mogel> but i know a lot of people that would seriously rather read dto than a  
         lot of "real" magazines out there                                       
 <mogel> so i don't see why not.  other than i don't have money. & it costs
         lots

 <_8> hahaha
 <_8> "the dto wallclock"                                                        
 <_8> "the dto sound system"                                                     
 <mogel> "dto gum"                                                               
 <m3rkuri> "the dto wave radio"                                                 
 <kkrazy> the dto car.                                                           
 <mogel> "beat this joke to death, please"                                       
 <kkrazy> <beat>                                                                 
 <_8> "dto lights" (cigarettes)
 <Mephisto> dto male and female condoms                                          
 <Mephisto> glows dto in the dark!                                               
 <kkrazy> i already said that, meph :)
 <Mephisto> oh :)                                                                
 <m3rkuri> "dto ibm clones"
 <tMM> dto punching bags                                                         
 <ven> the dto paper weight - available in "The Sharper Image Catalog"           
 <_8> "dto 32 ounce cups"!@!!!@@!#@                                              

 <m3rkuri> "dto nordic track"
 <mogel> "i am feeling uncreative tonight - i'll say this:  dto toothpaste"       
 <m3rkuri> "dto lightbulbs"                                                      
 <_8> dto bookshop.                                                              
 <_8> with little machines to read dto issues like in the wall to sample the     
     issues.                                                                    
 <kkrazy> dto lard.
 <kkrazy> the dto state park                                                     
 <ven> dto all season radials                                                    
 <Mephisto> how many dto writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
 <mogel> dto buckets of vomit!!!  heheheheheh1!!                                 
 <m3rkuri> "dto fake vomit"                                                      
 <mogel> beat you to it, merc!!!!!!!!!!                                          
 <m3rkuri> mogel - you inspired it                                               
 <kkrazy> the dto wailing wall
 <m3rkuri> "dto sneezing powder"                                                 
 <_8> "the dto hand buzzer"                                                      
 <m3rkuri> "dto diapers"                                                         
 <_8> "dto delivery"                                                             
 <_8> "dto pizza"                                                                
 <ven> dto magic tricks                                                          
 <m3rkuri> "i did it my way" by mogel [dto] - #1 best seller!
 <_8> "literal humor" by crank [dto] would be the best seller after that.        
 <mogel> heh
 <mogel> actually, if i wrote a book it would be called something like "LOOK
         AT MY PENIS" in caps like that                                             
 <m3rkuri> mogel - loompanics wouldn't even sell it!                             
 <_8> and be banned from southern hicksfuck, georgia school libraries            
 <mogel> that's awesome!                                                         
 <mogel> i'd be *self-published!*                                                
 <mogel> & that's much more fun!                                                 
 <mogel> i'll become a "cult item"                                               
 <m3rkuri> no mog, stores would still have to buy it.                            
 <mogel> FUCK THE STORES
 <m3rkuri> oh!#  i know how!#  the "dto printing press"                          


 <_8> "dto rowboats", just for fun.
 <ven> the McDto sandwich at mcdonalds                                           
 <m3rkuri> "dto vibrators"                                                       
 <m3rkuri> "dto happy meal"                                                      
 <_8> hahah                                                                      
 <Mephisto> "cooking with dto"
 <_8> "yo dto raps!"                                                             
 <Mephisto> "dto, the mini-series"                                                

 <m3rkuri> "the first dto church of god"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
 <mogel> god?
 <Mephisto> "the church of dto" merk
 <mogel> it would be the church of potatoEs or something                         
 <m3rkuri> "how i bought iowa" by mogel [dto]                                                                 

 <Mephisto> "the dto ab roller"                                                  
 <ven> buns of DTO                                                               
 <ven> abs by dto                                                                
 <tMM> body by mogel
 <_8> "dto and you"                                                              
 <ven> the dto game...on pc-cd rom                                               
 <m3rkuri> "dto, the dictator"!!                                                 
 <_8> "the dto wildlife reserve fund"                                            
 <_8> "dto pretzels"                                                             
 <mogel> right. so it's late & i'm bored                                                
 <ven> how about uh...  #dto the irc channel yeah                                
 <_8> "1-800-dto-love"                                                           

 <mogel> i think it's sleepy time
 <mogel> so, thanks for all those ideas, guys!!!!!!!!!!!!                        
 <mogel> i'm writing them down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                                   
 <mogel> i appreciate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11                      
 <m3rkuri> i don't think so mogel!!!!!!!!!
 <m3rkuri> i've seen you up at 5am!!!!!!!!!!                                     
 <mogel> mercuri, not in the last three weeks                                    
 <m3rkuri> chicken!!!
 <m3rkuri> *cluck*                                                               
 <mogel> this is the latest i've been up in a while                             

 <Mephisto> "history rewritten" by mogel
 <ven> dto posturepedic mattresses                                                
 <_8> "dto plastics and steel"
 <m3rkuri> "dto tinker toys"                                                     
 <m3rkuri> (3 & up)                                                              
 <_8> "dto trash-to-steam plant" to get rid of all the trash of all those        
     products mogel will sell!                                                  
 <tMM> dto sewage treatment                                                      
 <ven> dto power wheels                                                          
 <ven> pow pow power wheels                                                      

 <mogel> n-e-wayz bye.
 <m3rkuri> "dto power glove"                                                     
 <mogel> say BYE to me                                                           
 <m3rkuri> "dto gaming system"                                                   
 <_8> dto big wheels                                                             
 <ven> BYE MOGEL                                                                 
 <_8> bye mike!!!!!                                                              
 <ven> HAVE A GOOD SLEEP                                                         
 <mogel> thanks, JERKS                                                           
 <m3rkuri> "dto: the movie" by oliver stone; based on a script by michael
           chrichton
 <ven> i had the movie idea                                                      
 <_8> "chef dto-ar-dee"
 <Mephisto> boy-ar-dto                                                           

 <mogel> hm
 *** Signoff: mogel (Leaving)                                                    

 <_8> be like ellios pizza "the only zine that's SQUARE"                         
 <_8> that was fun.                                                              
 <_8> but no one mentioned dto keychains! 

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