free speech: something everyone is required to defend, usually when practiced by the odious or students who've stepped in excrement.

Usage: As he studied the inside of a cramped Santa Ana jail cell, student Richard Machado concluded that the Orange County jury did not interpret the explanation that he only wanted to "start a dialogue" with Asian students when he mass e-mailed them a message that said "I will hunt down and kill your stupid asses" as a whimsical exercise in free speech.


information wants to be free: tired hacker slogan formerly denoting that the flow of information is empowering and cannot be restricted; now a cliche usually spouted by a variety of dolts who employ it as a rationalization for ripping off others.

Usage: "Information wants to be free," thought Vice Miskovic, a teenager from Zadar, Croatia, as he uploaded his Make Money Fast cash pyramid scheme to the Usenet.


mutual assured annoyance: the state that exists when Department of Defense information warriors engage in secret combat with hackers or the information warriors of other nations.

Crystal often thought about the consequences that might befall him should his Air Force superiors ever discover that the best result his team of information warriors could hope for was mutual assured annoyance of the enemy.


source: an anonymous lawyer, corporate salesman, Dept. of Defense consultant, civil servant or Pentagon apparatchik employed by reporters and editors to pump up flaccid news with impressive quantities of phlogiston. See phlogiston.

Usage: By employing the clever techniques of information warfare, it will be possible to remove future dictators from power without firing a shot, said the Pentagon source to the credulous journalist.


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