AutoInsult v3.2

The latest version of this document is held at http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/jonrb/files/AutoInsult/AutoInsult.html which may be more recent than the version in autoinsult.zip

Contents

Overview
Installation
What's New?
Usage
The Styles
Feedback
FAQ
Registering
The Future
History
Acknowledgements
Support
Legal / License Agreement

Overview

AutoInsult is a silly little program that generates insults for you in a variety of styles. It then copies them into the clipboard (as text) so that you can paste them into emails, documents, or wherever else a good insult might be needed.

You can specify the number of insults to generate, the level of offensiveness, and various other options.

All the word resources are stored in an external file, which allows new dictionaries to be "plugged in".  Currently dictionaries in both English and American English are supplied, containing 4 styles (Arabian, Shakespearean, Modern and Mediterranean).

Installation

AutoInsult makes use of Windows95 / WindowsNT "INF" files.  These are install scripts to be used with the standard Windows Installer, and obviate the need for a full-blown setup program that would probably be bigger than AutoInsult itself.

To install:

IMPORTANT:   You must uninstall any previous versions of AutoInsult before installing this one.

• If you haven't done so already, unzip autoinsult.zip to a temporary folder.  If you don't have an unzip program then try WinZip (available at http:\\www.winzip.com). NB: Your unzip program MUST support long filenames.  Check the files after unzipping - if you have autoinsu.exe instead of AutoInsult.exe, then you need a new unzip program!
• Decide which of the two version you want to install - English or American English.
• Using explorer, say, click on inst_UK.inf (for the English version) or inst_US.inf (for the American English version) with your 2nd mouse button (usually the right mouse button) and select "install".
• The install script will copy the appropriate files to a folder called "AutoInsult" off your "Program Files" folder, add a new group to your "Start" menu, and add an uninstall entry in "Add / Remove programs" list.  (This will improve in the next version, when we add a full install program)
• You can delete the contents of the temporary folder now if you wish.

Occasionally Windows 95 will fail to install using the above method.  We're not quite sure why yet but believe it is a known bug in Windows95's long filename support.  WindowsNT works ok, but that's hardly a surprise.  :-)
To do a manual install, do the following

• Unzip autoinsult.zip as described above
• Delete the inf files (you don't need them).
• Delete the data file that you don't want (ie. delete inslt_UK.dat if you want US English and delete inslt_US.dat for British English)
• Create a shortcut on your desktop or Start menu.  You can create a shortcut by holding down your right mouse button over AutoInsult.exe and, without lifting the button, drag it onto your desktop.  When you release the button, a menu will pop-up.   Select "Create shortcut".
• That's it!

To uninstall:

• Go to Control Panel and select "Add / Remove programs"
• Select the entry for AutoInsult and click on "Add/Remove"
• The install script will remove AutoInsult. 
  NB: If you have moved the entry for AutoInsult in your "Start" menu somewhere else, then the uninstall script will not be able to remove it and you will have to remove it by hand.  Likewise if you have moved the program files elsewhere you will have to delete them by hand as well.

If you did a manual installation, you need only delete the folder AutoInsult is in, and also any shortcuts you may have created.  You can also delete AutoInsult.ini, found in your windows directory (eg. C:\Windows or C:\WinNT

What's New?

Since v3.1

• The Mediterranean style
• A resizing dialog (at last!)
• AutoCopy (the same as pressing "Copy To Clipboard" after pressing "Again Please!")
• Cool rounded buttons
• A cool new About box
• AutoInsult is now shareware (sorry, it had to be done).

Since v3.1 Beta

• An install / uninstall script.
• Searches for .dat files in both the current folder and the folder autoinsult.exe resides in.
• Now ships with both an English and an American English word file.

Since v3.01

• Searches for all files with a .dat extension in the folder autoinsult.exe resides in. Eliminates errors due to insultdata.dat being renamed and paves the way for multiple data files.
• Frequently Asked Questions moved to the on-line AutoInsult FAQ
• Added more words.
• Modern insults tab is no longer hidden when the offensiveness level is too low.  It is present and a message informs you that it is disabled until you enable it. This should prevent users thinking it is not included in the version they have.
• "More" button re-labelled as "Options"

Since v3.0

• Added extra reporting for errors
• Extended the documentation, including mentioning a bug that some people are reporting (see the FAQ)
• Added a few more words.

Since v3.0 Beta 3

• Fixed bug where modern style couldn't be set as default
• Added a proper picture to the Arabian style. (See Acknowledgements)
• Added "back" and "forward" keys so that if you hit "Again Please!" accidentally, you won't lose a good insult.
• Added 2 orders of magnitude more words (now 328billion combinations compared to 2.8billion).  A big "thank you" to Paul Levin for sharing the data from his Arabian Insult page at http://www.cris.com/~pelevin/insults.shtml
• Added tool-tips

Since v2.01

• Arabian-style insults
• All data is now stored in an external file, insultdata.dat.  You can download updated versions from the AutoInsult web page
• You can now select a number options to modify how the insults are generated.  These are remembered between sessions.

Usage

There's not a lot too it, really.  Choose the type of insult you want from the tabs at the top.  An insult will be generated.

You can then hit "Again Please!" to generate another.  When you have the perfect insult, press "Copy to Clipboard" to (gasp!) copy it to the clipboard. What you do with it after that is up to you (choosing "Paste" in an email is a good suggestion).

Click "About" to call up an "About" box which, amongst other things, will allow to you jump straight to our web site or send us some mail.

Use the "Options" menu to view and set the following options:

• The number of insults to generate each time.  Set this to be between 1 and 500.   (1-5 in the unregistered version)
• Whether or not AutoInsult is always on top.  Useful when you're doing several cut & pastes, I find.
• Whether or not to capitalise the initial word of each sentence.  This is useful if you want to paste your insult into an email as part of a sentence, rather than a new one.
• Whether to turn on AutoCopy or not.  AutoCopy automatically does a "Copy to clipboard" every time an insult is generated (ie. you press "Again Please!")
• Whether to turn ToolTips on or off.
• The offensiveness level.  At the moment this either enables or disables the Modern and Mediterranean insult styles.  In the future it may enable or disable sets of words.

Some people have been offended by parts of AutoInsult, mainly by the Modern and Mediterranean insult styles.   This is ok, not everyone's humour overlaps completely.  Some people find the Arabian and Shakespearean styles funny, but not the Modern and Mediterranean insult styles.  Because of this we have built in an option to disable or enable them.  In the future we plan to have word sets that will be enabled or disabled for the Arabian style, but for now, the insult level only controls whether or not the Modern and Mediterranean insult style insult tabs are enabled or not.

The Styles

Obviously the Shakespearean style is inspired by the Great Bard.

Marcin Oseka has this explanation for the Mediterranean style:

"A very strong belief in family values unites the nations of the Mediterranean Basin: there is no worst insult in Italy than calling a man "cornutto", which means "betrayed by his wife".  Family is a source of pride in those societies, and an insult aiming at the women in the family (mothers, sisters, wives) is often deemed worse than a stab in the back.  Such an insult can never be forgiven.   The cult of women and indeed insults aimed through them at their male protectors (sons, husbands, brothers) radiates from southern Europe to countries spiritually based upon Catholicism and Greek-Roman cultures.  Those nations who have turned their backs to Rome see women and the family differently: in Anglo-Saxon and protestant countries, where "son-of-a-bitch" can be used as a comma, no-one will be knifed because of the Mediterranean Insult."

There are no similar explanations for the modern or Arabian styles yet.

Feedback

We value your feedback!  We really want to hear if you like AutoInsult, or if you have a suggestion to improve it.  Please add an entry at the AutoInsult feedback page, or else mail us at Jumping.Armadillo@dial.pipex.com

However, if you do like AutoInsult, and you use it for more than 14 days, then you must register it.  Its the only way we can afford to continue developing AutoInsult - we're not a charity!

FAQ

The AutoInsult FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) is now held at http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/jonrb/files/AutoInsult/FAQ.html

If you don't have web access and would like a copy then please mail us and we'll be happy to send you the latest version.

Registering

AutoInsult is SHAREWARE.  You can use it for 14 days free of charge, but after that you must either uninstall it or register it.  The only way we can continue to support and develop AutoInsult, and other programs like it, is if people register.

The unregistered version has mildly reduced capabilities.  We hate crippling software as much as you hate it being crippled, so have tried to make it as mild as possible.  All we have done is reduce the number of combinations of words available by discarding every 6th word of each column of each style resulting in a 45-55% reduction in the number of combinations (depending on the number of fields).  We've also reduce the maximum number of insults you can generate each time you press "Again Please!" from 500 to 5.
We feel this is a reasonable reduction, and hope that it is small enough not to put you off, and big enough for you to consider registering.   We really hope we've got the balance right.

Registration is a mere US$12 (which includes an order processing free of  $3.48 which PSL charge us for each order).  For that you get our undying gratitude (naturally), priority support, a nice warm feeling and, of course, the enabling of all features, and the disabling of the reminder dialog at startup.   You will also get a discount off the forthcoming AutoInsult Editor and Bonus Pack, coming soon (see the Future).  PSL offer the further bonus of a big discount on their monthly shareware CD when you register.

To order on-line with your credit card, you can select the "Order" option in either the "Help" menu or the "About" box in AutoInsult, or you can use these links:

Secure Server (uses SSL)
Non-secure server (for people behind a firewall, or who who can't use SSL)
Fax and email ordering are coming soon.

It doesn't matter if your home currency is not US Dollars - ours isn't, as we're UK based.  Your credit card company will let you pay for AutoInsult in dollars, and will convert it to your local currency at the prevailing exchange rate when they send you your statement.  It couldn't be easier!

As soon as PsL notifies us that your order as been processed, we will email you an unlock code which you can use to fully enable all AutoInsult's features.

Unlocking AutoInsult's features

When you get the unlock email from us, you'll need to choose the "Register" option on the "Help" menu.  You'll be prompted to enter your registered name and the unlock code, both of which will be in the email.  Please make sure you type them in exactly (including capital letters, spaces and punctuation).  Assuming you have entered them correctly, AutoInsult will be unlocked.  This is a one-off thing - you won't need to do it again, unless you uninstall and reinstall AutoInsult, or install it on another computer (please read the License Agreement first if you plan to do this). 

The Future

We have plans for AutoInsult!  Assuming people register and support it, we plan to add the following:

• The AutoInsult Editor and Bonus Pack (see below)
• More words (of course)
• A timed insult service that can pop up an insult for you at regular intervals whilst the main program stays hidden on the task tray.
• The ability to Net Message an insult to someone over your network.

So okay, what is the AutoInsult Editor and Bonus Pack?

We're currently working on an editor which will let you add words to the current styles, and also add complete new styles of your own.  Its starting to look good, and we anticipate a release date towards the end of October 1998 for the first beta.   This beta will only be available to registered users though (another incentive to register!)

The bonus pack will include an ActiveX version of AutoInsult (for inclusion in client-side web pages, or embedded in your own applications), a command-line / console version (for server-side web pages, CGI scripts, etc.) plus any other little utilities we happen to write that may be useful for you.

We anticipate the Editor and Bonus Pack to be in the region of $25, with a discount for existing registered users.

History

Acknowledgements

The resources for the Shakespearean insults were found on the web.  There are many sites that generate these insults.  Some sites credit Jerry Maguire of Center Grove High School, Greenwood Indiana, as being the originator of the list of words.

A small proportion of the modern words came from an old MS-DOS program called "Insults" (original name, huh?) from the Modern Advisory Institute, Utah (Freeware, © 1983-1985).  Incredibly we still had a copy of it on a floppy disk.

Likewise some of the Arabian insult words came from Paul Levin. Visit his Arabian Insult page at http://www.cris.com/~pelevin/insults.shtml

A proportion of the Mediterranean insult words came from Marcin Oseka, and also the explanation of the Mediterranean style.

All the other words came from JonRB's own sick head!

The pictures for the Arabian style and Mediterranean came from http://www.internet-stuff.com/multimedia_gallery/index.html . Thanks to berliner@home.com for introducing us to this site.  As far as we are aware all the pictures we have used are royalty-free and have no restrictions that prevent us from including them in this application.

We consider all the words to be in the Public Domain (especially the Modern, Arabian and Mediterranean ones, which are all either in the dictionary or recognised as being in common verbal usage) and do not feel that we have infringed anyone's copyright.  If you disagree then please contact us.  Any trademarks used in the word list are acknowledged as belonging to their owners.  Whilst we acknowledge the words themselves to be in the Public Domain, we retain copyright on our data files.  You may not use them for your own programs.

Support

We are willing to provide limited email support at our discretion to unregistered users, and priority email support to registered users.

Please mail us at Jumping.Armadillo@dial.pipex.com stating your problem, with as much detail as possible.  We're afraid that emails that simply say "your software doesn't work" will not help much.  We will look into the problem and may provide a workaround or bug fix.

We are not willing to provide any support via phone or fax, even if you offer to phone us or otherwise pay for the call.  JonRB really doesn't appreciate people in different time zones phoning in the middle of the night (our offices are in his house).

Before emailing, be sure to check http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/jonrb/AutoInsult.html for the latest version of AutoInsult and http://dspace.dial.pipex.com/jonrb/files/AutoInsult/AutoInsult.html for the latest version of this document.

Legal / License Agreement

Jumping Armadillo will also not be responsible for how the insults generated by AutoInsult are used.  By using AutoInsult you agree to indemnify, hold harmless, and defend Jumping Armadillo from and against any claims or lawsuits, including attorney's fees, that arise or result from the use or distribution of the insults it generates.  You should be aware of the laws of slander and libel before you send insults to people who may be lacking a sense of humour.

You may freely distribute this software so long as either the original zip file or the files contained within it are distributed together and are not modified in any way. You may not sell this software to anyone, and may not charge anyone for distributing it.  It may not be bundled in any CD or compilation without prior permission.
However, if you choose to register, you should keep your unlock code secret.  You should not give it to other people.

Copyright (C) 1997, 1998, Jon Roch-Berry / Jumping Armadillo Software.
All rights reserved. All registered trademarks are recognised as belonging to their respective owners.